Speaking with love

The importance of speaking love to ourselves is how kids learn and grow up to be better adults that respect themselves and know their worth. Boy or girl it’s important for us to understand our voices become their inner voice and oftentimes it becomes their critic. We have to look inward to understand our triggers and get a hold of ourselves and our reactions in order to give kindness back to our kids. The way we speak to ourselves and them matter it’s the beginning of how they learn to treat others and most importantly themselves. 

We have too many hurt adults out there that could've been avoided had their parents spoke love to them with kindness and grace. I understand we want to give that tough love but isn’t the world tough enough? We need to be their safe spaces. 

We practice conscious parenting in our home not to be confused with permissive parenting (honestly sometimes we resort to permissive parenting because we choose our battles and we are tiredt over here) because there are consequences and although some days we choose our battles or we react instead of responding it’s a lifestyle of actively having to take a step back and reevaluate where we are with ourselves we have to check in with ourselves in order to show up in this world for ourselves and for our kids. I have found myself not caring whether or not I hurt someone else's feelings if that means standing up and advocating for my child. 

I have had to tell adults that their emotions are their own and nothing my baby does should affect them enough to alter their mood. That's a big responsibility to put on our kids. I often think about the times my own parents didn’t stand up for me and how that made me feel unworthy of respect. Sometimes getting yelled at or hit taught me love meant screaming and being physical. Watching my mom and other elders speak so low of themselves in not loving their body or hair taught me to be critical of my own body and hair. 

Can you imagine had I been spoken to and taught to love myself and be confident in myself inside and out; I wouldn’t have had to do so much work in discovering my own worth. I wouldn’t have allowed so much disrespect from others especially in dating. I could have avoided so much heartbreak throughout the years.